Abuse Victims Speak Out in Bathroom Wars

June 6, 2016 — 2 Comments

“My children don’t want to use the bathrooms anymore. That is huge for a child who’s been sexually abused.” ADFlegal (5:45) 

The Alliance Defending Freedom recently posted a video discussion regarding the debate over gender neutral bathroom laws. The video gives voice to several women who have been sexually abused as children. The parent quoted above has adopted several children who have suffered sexual abuse.

One suffers the indignity of “accidents” at school rather than using a bathroom where she feels afraid.

The school this mother’s children attend recently changed its bathroom policy. The trauma of being trans and not wanting to use the bathroom has become trauma for those who have suffered abuse.

Some of those speaking out are years removed from their abuse. At 1:25, the video shows one “survivor of sexual trauma” who found herself in a workplace conundrum.

Her employer wanted her to write “talking points” about “gender identity based locker and bathroom usage.” As a child, this woman “had never had a shower experience that was safe.” Her fear went with her to college. As a college athlete, she took every locker room shower with her underwear on.

When she voiced her concerns about the policy proposal, her boss offered her two options. The first was immediate termination. The second might seem a kinder and gentler option, termination with severance and benefits. But it came with the condition that she remain silent about her objections. The offer meant to protect the employer.

They offered her money to keep her mouth shut. And who of us might have trouble turning down cash when you’re about to lose your job? Her response?

“I’ve been silenced enough in my life. . . . That wasn’t an option for me anymore.”

There are compelling testimonies in this video.

The final–and perhaps most surprising–is discussion from a transgender woman who believes that these laws defy the safety of women and children. “At a time where so many sexual assaults go unreported, we’re telling them that their boundaries don’t matter.” And no one should be “blamed for being uncomfortable.”

None of the people testifying in this video hate transgender people. They do not fear transgender people. They fear predators willing to take advantage of this kind of change.

So says the woman whose silence could not be purchased:

“When people look at these policies and these regulations as they’re coming up across the states, they have a real sense of compassion. And that’s good. And they, they form these ideas that they should support these measures because it’s a compassionate thing to do.

“I think what they’re not considering–and what I’m hoping that they will–is that this has such devastating implications for people like me. The presence of a male of any variety, whether he’s somebody who identifies as trans or not, whether he has deviant motives or not, that’s irrelevant to the reality that, for survivors of sexual trauma, to just turn around to be exposed to that is an instant trigger.”

Our society is working to become more compassionate. But compassion can’t come at the expense of a population who has already been victimized.


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Disclosure of Material Connection:  I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the entities I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

 

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