The Choices that Shape Us

I remember sitting in a college classroom, a criminology class, and hearing the instructor discuss “victimless” crimes, the encounters society frowned upon (more then, less now) but that “didn’t hurt anyone.”

The instructor suffered from the disillusionment that “consenting adults” could engage each other, agree to exploit each other, walk away, and remain unchanged, unharmed, perhaps even happier or better off for having had the experience.

Somehow when one eternal soul encounters another, both change. Loving choices produce good–satisfaction in our purpose fulfilled.

Exploiting choices, unrepented and left to themselves, never produce happiness or anything else we can call “better”.

We human beings shape and reshape ourselves and each other–all through the power of our choices.

We cannot, of course, ignore the work God does in shaping us. Our circumstances–not all resulting from our choices–shape us. But always, always, we choose how we react to every situation.

There is a calling, a mandate, on our lives. That calling demands a response. A false response refuses to acknowledge the harm sin causes. A true response resists evil, evil that has power to do great harm.

In his discussion of J.R.R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings and C.S. Lewis’s various works, Joseph Loconte presents this universal calling:

“One may answer the Call–or refuse it, turn away, and walk into Darkness. But indifference to the Call to struggle against evil is not an option; one must take sides. Thus, set before our imagination in the works of Tolkien and Lewis is one of the great paradoxes of our mortal lives: the mysterious intersection of providence and free will” (152).

Every day, we choose to answer the call or neglect it. We choose the good way or our own way.

As our choices shape us, so do they shape our society.

And the shifts in society manifest themselves in changed language. Unborn humans have not just become fetuses. Clinic workers must never say the word baby. They call the child tissue, a blob.

Prostitutes are sex workers now. That’s a very clinical sounding term for something that sounds like an innocuous business. That innocuous business has grown into sex trafficking, even of children, even in America.

Porn is not victimless. It turns its viewers into addicts.

And it abuses and entraps those who produce it. In the meantime, the audience for porn becomes younger and seeks “ever harsher and more violent, degrading images.”

Abortion obviously harms the child, and less obviously, but still profoundly, harms the mother. Even less obvious, but perhaps as profound, is the damage to fathers, surviving siblings, and other family and friends.

And let’s not neglect the harm done to those within the abortion industry. Many within pro-life ranks today left clinic work to stand for life. They have answered the call. But healing is a long road.

Many wounded remain behind and cause more harm.

Loconte: “It is through their own decisions . . . that they invite a spiritual crisis into their lives. The result is not the freedom they imagined, but the deepest slavery of heart and mind” (163).

God bids us to answer His call–to be instruments of healing–to make choices that will shape us, others, and our society for good.

He calls us to speak the truth in love. Our refusal to do so can only bring more hurt.

It’s our choice.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Nancy E. Head’s Restoring the Shattered is out in paperback! Get your copy here!

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18 Replies to “The Choices that Shape Us”

    1. Yes, Melissa, the consequences of our decisions reverberate for a long, long time–much longer than we realize at the beginning. Thanks and God bless!

  1. Powerful message and very on point. Our society does not want to call anything bad or sinful so that they feel better. But, all our actions have consequences that affect and change us. And some very much damage us. We must stay aware and awake to these schemes of the enemy. Thanks for sharing.

    1. That’s such a wonderful aspect of coming to Christ. He doesn’t make everything comfortable. He just uses it all. Sometimes the trouble we’ve gotten ourselves into helps others get out of their trouble. Thanks, Melissa. God bless!

  2. THIS – so good! “God bids us to answer His call–to be instruments of healing–to make choices that will shape us, others, and our society for good.” I agree wholeheartedly.

  3. A superb clarion call. You have the voice of a prophet. Thank you for sharing this. I’m scheduling this post for my author page. Thank you for answering God’s call to write what he gives you to say and not to waver from it. God bless you, Nancy!

    “God bids us to answer His call–to be instruments of healing–to make choices that will shape us, others, and our society for good. He calls us to speak the truth in love. Our refusal to do so can only bring more hurt. It’s our choice.”

  4. It is profound how our choices affect us and others and systems. Even the slightest or most natural of choices can have a profound effect. Thank you for illustrating this subtlety.

    1. Thank you, Stephen. It’s sometimes shocking to consider how a small decision made such a big difference. The big decisions linger for years–for good or bad. God bless!

  5. Powerful message, Nancy. Our choices do shape us and others and culture. And we decide to let God shape us or not.

    You summed it up in a nutshell: “God bids us to answer His call–to be instruments of healing–to make choices that will shape us, others, and our society for good.”

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